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He must have died and gone to heaven.
His fingers moved into my folds and spread my lips apart, exposing my clit-I could've died twice over due to the way he looked at me. His eyes were greedy, hungry...carnal. Finally, he took a leisurely swipe at my sex. It was too much to watch mixed with the way he looked at me.
"Oh, come on!"
Ryan got up from where he knelt, pulling me up with him and flipped me over the arm of the couch. SMACK! His hand made contact with my butt cheek. "I thought I heard you complaining, Danica."
"No!" I lied.
"I mean, yes! I was!"
He turned me over and motioned for me to sit again. I did as he asked without hesitation and he murmured praise for me learning so quickly. "Legs." I immediately obeyed. "Good." His ministrations were smooth and calculated, driving my body to heights it hadn't been to since the last time he went down on me. "Are you closing your eyes, Danica?"
"I was, but they're open now."
"I'll let it slide," he said before reaching up to grab my breasts. "Only because I can't resist these. So beautiful." He took my nipples in between his fingers and rolled them, making my back bow in pleasure.
My body climbed even higher...
I was on the edge...
Ryan tightened his grip on my nipples and sucked my clit, tossing me completely over the edge. Before I could come down, he had me flipped onto my stomach and was entering me from behind. He groaned as he bottomed out. Tears started to sting my eyes.
As much as I longed for Ryan and his body, I longed more for his heart and his mind-after he came, I would have none of those things. It was my own fault, really. I begged him to take me, and it was my own ignorance that led to my breakdown. I had no clue what being this close to Ryan would do to me; I didn't realize it would enflame my heart before shredding it to pieces. I hated myself for wanting him, and I hated him for letting me. He was right, of course-I had no clue what I was asking him for.
"What?" I sniffled.
"You're crying." He stopped moving and pulled out of me. I winced from the sudden feeling of emptiness. "What's the matter?" When I didn't answer, he picked me up, turning me so I'd have to look at him; in my face was his answer. "Danica," he groaned as if he felt my pain.
I continued to cry as he carried me to my bed and laid me down. I was surprised when he curled up behind me. "No. You can leave if you want. I'm fine."
"No you're not," he whispered, his voice thick.
"But I have to be."
"You don't have to be okay, Dani," his voice broke as he said my name, making me turn around to face him. "I told you neither of us needed this. God, why did you let me do this? Why did I let myself do this?"
His eyes were red with tears; it broke my heart and somehow mended it at the same time. His tears told me he was hurting to; they told me that even through all of the callous silence, he cared for me as I cared for him. A new wave of tears fell down my face as I climbed on top of Ryan's erection.
"Dan-oh God," he said as I lowered myself onto him. "What are you doing?" he sounded out of breath.
"You can't start something and not finish it-especially this. It's too late to take it back. It's just too late," I whispered while sliding down his erection. The word that came out of my mouth was a garbled combination of "ah" and "ouch". He had never been this deep in me before; it was a welcome, however, alien feeling. I bent down, buried my face in Ryan's neck and undulated my hips. He uttered harsh, four-lettered epithets as I moved up and down and circled around him. Ryan wrapped his arms around me and kissed my shoulders, face, and neck, bringing me closer to my climax.
"Sit up, baby. Sit up."
I did as he said and he placed his hands on my hips, rendering me immobile before he began to push into me. The feeling was so intense that my sex immediately rippled around his girth. "Ryan!"
"Just feel it for me, baby. I need you to feel it for me-for us."
And with that, my body froze over.
"There is no us."