Popular Marcus learns how much is sister loves him over the holidays. Videos
Hank and Jean's story brought to an end.
I grabbed my mix bowl and my billy from the cupboard next to my barby.
I sat on the deck sofa, pack a cone, pulled it, repacked it, put it down on the deck table.
I waited until the smoko took hold before I got and walked over to the deck bar to make a drink.
A double Jack Daniels on the Rocks, four rocks.
Both my fridges had the ice maker in the freezer door, the best invention since sliced bread.
I was about to put my bum back down on the cushion of the deck sofa when I heard George Thorogood's 'Bad To The Bone', my ring-tone.
I almost spilt my drink grabbing the billy and the mix bowl, I walked into the house, sniffing the air as I went.
I deemed that it was 'Herby' safe and closed the deck door.
By the time I had got to my phone, it had stopped ringing.
I looked at the number on the screen, it was a number that I failed to recognise.
I hit the call-back button, it started to ring.
A female voice answered after the third ring, "Jean Davis?"
"Oh, hey, Jean, it's Vic Jones, I just missed your call." I spluttered.
"Hey, Vic, yeah, I was, ah, wondering, do you wanna catch up for a drink, sometime, you know, maybe..."
"Yeah sure," I cut her off before she finished what she was saying.
Was I that unconsciously eager to get into this woman's pants?
The words 'you fuckwit' twittered in my mind, inwardly, I groaned.
"I mean, yeah, that sounds great, what have you got in mind?"
Good grief, I sounded like a typical sleaze-bag.
"I know this might sound sleazy, but, umm, is your place ok?"
Her voice slithering all over me again.
"I'll shout us Thai, you provide the alcohol?" she added.
Alarm bells, peening in my skull, this was nuts.
I was torn between wanting to seduce this wonderful woman and finding out more about her.
Back in her office, her eyes masked a hidden agenda, I was curious to see where she wanted to go with this.
I also wanted to taste every inch of her glorious body.
I was unsure about the future, as most people are, it's just, that I was struggling with the concept of this woman being my sister.
What mattered to me, she was gorgeous before I read her birth certificate.
It was impossible that she knew my favourite food
"Umm, yeah, that, ah, sounds fabulous. What do you prefer to drink with Thai?" I enquired.
"Oh, pretty much anything that's wet, really, I usually shake my pinky for a double JD on the rocks, four rocks." she told me casually.
I dropped my phone. Fuck me!
"FUCK!" I exclaimed, a little too loudly.
The phone hit the rug, rebounded under the couch.
I heaved said couch until I spotted the phone, dived on it and threw it against my ear.
"Sorry, I nearly tripped over Herby, my dog, he's a lump, lays anywhere, mongrel," I laughed quietly. Lame, 'you idiot'.
I glanced at my dog, he was in Canine Fantasyland, curled up in front of the fire, the occasional 'whoommf' emitting from his mouth, his jowls wobbling as the puff of air escapes his lips, fifteen feet away.
"Umm, yeah, I reckon I can handle that, no probs," I replied.
"Great, I'll see you in ten seconds, I'm at your front door" she said.
The call ended, I stood there like a dork staring at my phone in my hand.
The front door bell scared the shit outta me. "FUCK!"
I tore up the hallway, skidding to a stop on the polished wooden floor, three inches from the front door.
Herby was two seconds behind me, barking his balls off.
My hand on the doorknob, twisting it, I pulled the door, I checked my reflection in the hallway mirror, I was naked, bar my socks.
I slammed the door shut. "Just a sec." I yelled.
"BACK!" I yelled at Herby to shut him up. He stopped barking.
I looked left, right, up, down, around looking for cover, anything.
I spotted my towel hanging over my bedroom door, a bad habit I know, but hey, in this particular instance, I reserve the right to be excused.
I wrapped my towel around my waste, hanging on to it with my left hand, on my left hip, tightly.
I pointed to Herby then back at the loungeroom.